Well, first of all, don’t look at me. I’m writing this with the very latest quill pen and the inkwell is also state of the art. Should anyone offer me a mechanical loom on which to weave a new writing cap, I would not break it with a sledgehammer but embrace the innovation. You have to move with the times, daddy-o.

Who am I trying to kid here? When it comes to fear of technology verging on the Luddite, I yield to no one. Even my nonagenarian mother has been known to refer to me as “old stone man”. But to help with your plight, dear reader, let’s make mine a cautionary tale — in the hopes of luring you (if not me) back to the future.

Here’s an example of how not to do it. For an embarrassingly long time FT colleagues had to endure seeing me in greyscale on our regular video meetings — all colour drained, I was the lone head and shoulders presenting my up-to-the-minute news ideas in old-timer’s black and white. No idea what button I initially pressed to do this, but the inability to work out how to re-enter the world of technicolour continued for months.